The Redesigning Wellness Podcast

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136: Being Kind, Not Nice with Marcia Sirota, MD

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Dr. Marcia Sirota - bio-pic

There are so many emotions that come into the workplace each day, some harkening back to childhood hurt and trauma. According to today’s guest, Dr. Marcia Sirota, a board-certified psychiatrist, this “emotional leaking” can result in toxic workplace behaviors. We’re all familiar with the micromanager and bully but what about the too nice people pleaser? Turns out, being too nice comes with its own set of problems in the workplace.

This episode shines a light on us as individuals and what we can do to be kind, not nice. In a way, it’s a bit of personal development episode. Our roles as wellness pros can sometimes lean towards people pleasing because we’re so passionate about helping people. Even if you’re thinking people pleasing isn’t a problem for you, this interview will still be helpful because we also talk about other aspects of toxic workplace behaviors.

In this interview, Dr. Sirota breaks down the difference between being nice and kind, what can happen if we’re too nice at work and how we can be kind and advance at work. She also addresses other toxic behaviors such as bullying, micromanaging and passive aggression and when you need to “vote with your feet”.

Dr. Sirota also graciously offer listeners a coupon for 50% off her courses at the end of the interview.

Update: Next Generation Wellness training dates – two options

  • 23 to Nov. 18 (Mondays at 1 pm EST): Click HERE for more details.
  • August 26th at the WELCOA Summit Pre-Intensive: Click HERE for more details.
Interview Highlights:
  • [5:23] The difference between being nice and kind (and some examples).
  • [7:30] Where people pleasing comes from and why it’s a losing proposition.
  • [12:55] The line between being a people pleaser and being a strategic worker.
  • [17:20] The toxic ways people show up in the workplace.
  • [19:10] Marcia walks us through how to deal with passive aggressive co-workers, micromanagers and workplace bullies.
  • [27:55] What bullying looks like in the workplace.
  • [32:30] How people pleasing show up in men vs women.
  • [35:28] What we can do to apply these concepts within an organization.

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Marcia’s Course page: REDESIGNINGWELLNESS (discount code) 50%

The Dark Side of Being Too Nice

Marcia’s book – Be Kind, Not Nice

Full Bio:

Dr. Marcia Sirota is a board-certified psychiatrist practicing in Toronto, Canada. She has more than 25 years of experience specializes in health and wellness, healing trauma, overcoming blocks to creativity and empowering people to be their best, most optimal self.  

She is the founder of the Ruthless Compassion Institute, whose mandate is to promote the philosophy of Ruthless Compassion and in so doing, improve the lives of people, everywhere. In her spare time, she enjoys reading, running, yoga and working out.


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